Monday, April 15, 2013

Living, Learning, and Being Loved

Hey there, everybody!

Have I got a lot to tell you!  I saw that it's been about six months since my last post.  I had big plans to write all about our adventures with Sam, our Aussie girl, but we stayed pretty busy.  Not doing anything earth moving, just being a little family.

We liked Sam so well, we were blessed with a Finnish daughter, Hanna, for this semester.  She is attending my alma mater and having a great time.  And we have enjoyed Hanna so much, we have already lined up a daughter from New Zealand for the whole year, next year.

We are growing our family one beautiful daughter at a time.  In the process, we have learned that we get to choose ALL of our children.  Having the girls in the house reminded Brian and me that we aren't spring chickens, and we really needed to start our family.  After some tests, it has been determined that I can't have my own kids.  You know, the old fashioned way.

That took awhile for this little perfectionist to accept, I can tell you.  I felt defective.  I was crushed that I would never pass on my blue eyes and fiery spirit--genetically.  I have long felt that Brian and I would make very pretty babies, and I didn't like being told that wasn't going to happen.

I don't really do "No."

I try to talk about what's going on pretty openly; the more I do, the easier it gets.   It is humbling in more ways than I can tell you to know that I will still be a mom--just not the way I always thought I would.

As crushed as I was at first, I feel grateful now.

I am so aware that God definitely has a plan for this little family, and while it isn't what I expected, I know that wanting to take Sam into our lives was the beginning.

Brian continues to be the most amazing man I have ever known.  He says this isn't something that happened to me; it happened to us.  He thinks adopting our kids will be quite an adventure.  Our parents and friends agree.

That has been the best part, by far.  The support system we have is unbelievable.

We haven't begun the formal process quite yet.  There are still things to talk about, things to prepare.  We think 2 brothers would be pretty awesome.

So, our journey takes another crazy turn.  Once again, our little marshmallows were squished, and once again, we bounce back.

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