Tilting At Windmills....Again

It's that time again.  The last day of the grading period.  Once again, I have several students failing my classes or other classes.  And once again, the only reason they are is the failure to complete and turn in assignments.  Once again, it is contest time in Band and Choir and Track season.  Once again, the students failing are the ones needed most desperately by their teammates. 

I have started tutorials at 7:30 am and given up my conference period the last two days to tutor athletes, singers and band members.  And they owe so much work, it's not enough.  I can give up Monday as well; grades won't be pulled until Monday at midnight. 

I can do tutorials at 7:30 am and give up my conference period, but should I?  The parental instinct I have tells me, "No!"...quite sharply, too, I might add.  But the middle school kid in me who depended on these students to be eligible for contest and athletics is frantic to get the work in.  I remember the thrill of the winning and I want these students to have it. 

I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe, if they could experience that winning feeling that would inspire them to try harder in the classroom next time.  Pretty in my world, isn't it? 

I liken this effort to spitting in a bucket with a hole in it, trying to fill it. 

And yet, I find myself here every Friday of the end of the grading period, trying harder and caring more than the students I am trying to help.  So, am I helping them?  I honestly don't know. 

I know that 99 % of these kids will go on to be productive citizens in society.  I have taught long enough to see the proof.  And that 1%, well, I have taught long enough to see what happens to them, too.  And as my husband goes to a middle school today to arrest a 12 year old for robbery, maybe I feel the need to try just a little harder to have more of the 99% and less of the 1%. 

I have to believe, as tired and frustrated that I am, that I will have more students like Kerry, a sophomore in college now on a track scholarship.  He had troubles in middle school, and he is becoming a great man.  I have to believe that I will more students like the Vaitai brothers who recently signed their football scholarships to college.  One to TCU. 

I have to believe that caring FOR them will eventually become the kids caring on their own.  I rationalize my actions by pointing out that they are ultimately not escaping the work, even if they have left it to the last minute.  We are teaching them responsibility by getting the work from them...even if it takes a little longer for some. 

So I will go to Happy Hour today with other frustrated teacher friends and tell myself that I am keeping the kdis in their extracurricular activites and out of trouble with the police.  I will tell myself that one day they will visit my class all grown up and lecturing my current students on the importance of doing work on time. 

And I will have at least one very large margarita.